Letter Never Sent

My cat, Sarah, and I play this neat little game on a regular basis. See, she goes and hides little presents in her sandbox and then I go and find them. Actually, it’s not as much fun as it sounds.

Happy VD.

I met up with some of my friends from IRC in Berkeley. They’re a couple of cool guys. They came and picked me up at the hotel after work. Then we went to Oakland for chinese food in Oakland’s chinatown. Then we went over and wandered around Berkeley for a while.

I’m in California for a little while. Maybe I’ll write something about it when I get more time.

I’ll be making more of a concerted effort to keep updating the site. I enjoy doing it, but it has just fallen by the way side lately. For those that know me personally you know I’ve been busy with new things at work, with changes in my life, and, confidentially, fighting the defeatism always calling to those who are tired of being lied to and who feel that life and the dynamic human spirit is worth fighting for.

I appreciate that a few of you have missed the site. Even though I do it more as a compulsion, it means a lot to know that some find my editorial sorting and belly-aching useful.

Soon I will have a laptop. I’ve been saving up for a few weeks and have been thinking about it for a few months. Do I need one? No. Can I justify it in any way? Not really. Do I want one? Hell yes.

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking because of recent personal problems involving the breakup with my ex. Of course, I’ve done a characteristically bad job with things. I can always be counted on to do the exact wrong thing in any situation and come off looking like an asshole to everyone involved. One thing I was wondering, just randomly is: who do you think are happier pessimists or optimists? If you had to choose either which would you choose and which do you think are better off in the long run?

Have you ever had that feeling that your heart might collapse into itself forming a blackhole from which you’d fear being unable to escape except for the fact that you find yourself caring less and less and less? Yea, me neither.