I was overjoyed to see a beautiful flock of cedar waxwings land outside my window. They are gorgeous brownish grey birds with little red and yellow accents and feathered crests. They are migratory so you will only see them during certain short periods of the year, and from what I’ve read they subsist solely on berries so they are constantly moving in search of food. Here is a great photo of them.
02
Mar 05
Analogies and metaphors
Life fascinates me, people fascinate me. I want to know and understand things and thereby help fix things, remove poisons, untwist knots. But, why do I want to “fix” things? I’m not sure.
Today I have been thinking about addiction and escape. Why people cling to their addictions for fear of themselves. In composing my thoughts tying extraversion to sadism, introversion to masochism, I reread some Weininger. His ideas on sadism and masochism are profound, although in his view sadism and masochism seem to be terms of expressing duality especially as relates to male/ female nature.
01
Mar 05
Quake family tree
All you gaming geeks will appreciate this graphic. It shows all the games that have been based on id software’s various 3D rendering engines including Quake, Quake 2, Quake 3, and Doom 3. Unfortunately, past success does not guarantee future success, so it will be interesting to see which games use the Doom 3 engine other than Quake 4. Many new games are based on Epic Games’ Unreal / Unreal 2 engine and presumably Valve Software will license their incredible Half Life 2 engine to developers. For a shape of things to come check out some of the screenshots from the Unreal 3 engine.
28
Feb 05
New Fiona Apple
I really enjoyed this new Fiona Apple song, Extraordinary Machine, which I came across via the ever linkworthy Waxy.org. It doesn’t sound like her hit songs, Criminal, etc., but it’s great. It sounds like something from an old disney movie or something. It has a very catchy phrasing. Oh, just listen to it.
28
Feb 05
“Comics is about memory”
I came across a video from a French television program on comics featuring Chris Ware. You can download the torrent here.
A number of things he said struck me, namely about how drawing comics is more about how you remember things than the things themselves and how he feels that drawing comics is an inherently difficult and depressing art since you are busy drawing while everyone else is living. Maybe that says more about Chris Ware than it does comics, but it is true to a certain extent. Drawing comics means being an observer, more so than other art forms because your main task is to tell a story with words and pictures. This position as observer dictates a certain amount of distance from life and then the sense of alienation he describes as you retreat into memory and the past.
His home is lined with antique photographs and he fiddles with a phonograph while he explains the superiority of bygone times when people knew what life was really about. His nostalgia for and idealization of the past reminds me of Robert Crumb with his identical collection of ragtime 78 RPM records. In the same way, it is not his own past he is nostalgic for, but the remote past from the stories of his grandmother. Is it easier to be nostalgic for a time you never experienced? If you feel like you don’t fit in, is it easier to construct an idealized representation of a dead reality? Retreating into the past is a strategy for avoiding the alienation and uncertainty of the present. Even though the past is dead the imagination can imbue it with an almost mystical reality. In a sense, the past is the ideal framework for the imagination since it has a more definite form in the mind and can be more easily controlled as far as its meaning. The future is unlimited in possibility and in definition.
25
Feb 05
Big things on my list
Lists are your friend… your best friend, if you can rely on yourself to keep them updated and fresh. They’re useless if you don’t check things off the list. The web design job I’ve been waiting to apply for has finally opened up here. I need to do several things this weekend and next week to be ready for it. I’ve also done a few things to get to the point where I can start freelancing as a full-time occupation if I decide to take the plunge. I have nothing to lose, but I wanted to wait and try for the web design spot here before I seriously considered it. In the event I fail to get either position I’m going for, I will resign and go into business for myself.
Here’s the list for the freelance side of things:
Get assumed name (DBA) in order to operate a business as a sole-proprietor without needing to create a separate business entity (incorporate).You would normally do this in each city you do business.Get P.O. Box address.Design and print business literature (envelopes, business cards, etc.)- Open business account in order to keep separate books.
- Complete main site design for business website.
For this particular position:
Rework resume. I generally create a new resume for each job I apply to.Create resume website.Compile portfolio of recent work.- Create demo site specifically for interview.
24
Feb 05
Comic gold: Aries K car advertisement
This is the funniest thing I’ve seen today. Some guy made a video advertisement to sell his ’88 Dodge Aries K car. I admire people who spend this much time and effort doing something just for a laugh.
24
Feb 05
Ashes to ashes to gunpowder
I have never read anything by Hunter S. Thompson, nor did I like the film adaptation of “Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas“. Yet, his suicide is strangely compelling. Who can understand the depth of another person’s pain? I can’t, but I can relate to the desire to have everything just stop. Putting the tragedy of the situation aside because I don’t pretend to know or love the man, I am in awe of anyone who commits suicide. Not because I think it’s cool or because I admire their decision, just because of how it goes against what seems to me a natural urge for continuance. Suicidal thoughts are commonplace, but the act itself is not. I always wonder how much thought goes into it. Are most suicides impulsive expressions of agony, or well-planned, well-thought actions? How can you ever be sure you’re making a decision you would not take back if you could?
23
Feb 05
Google movies
Google introduced a Rotten-Tomatoes-like film rating function today. Check it out. I like being able to get an idea of the average opinion on things like films, books, food, and music.