Why do the trees and plants have it in for me? They spew their pollen and gametes into the air in an attempt to make more baby trees and in the process cause me considerable irritation and adversity. I like baby trees as much as the next guy but at what cost? I’m tired of sneezing and itchy eyes. I took two benedryl and woke up in my chair almost four hours later. It needs to stop. Not to mention that it seems really inefficient to just blow clouds of pollen into the air. There’s something perverse about billions of tree sperms wafting about on currents of air and then getting sucked up peoples’ noses. Why don’t trees just do it the old-fashioned way like everything else? You know, gettin’ it on. The thought of this actually brings strange images to mind and a whole new meaning to ‘wood’.
Goodnight. I’m going to go to sleep.
pollen n. : a fine powder produced by the anthers of seed-bearing plants; fine grains contain male gametes
gamete n. : a mature sexual reproductive cell having a single set of unpaired chromosomes